On learning to read, and other educational matters

Every time I see a "look what my kids can do" video I cringe a little. Not because I don't love to watch what all my friends cute little kids can do, I do. I smile and giggle and congratulate along with all the rest. I cringe a little because I know somewhere there is a mommy watching that video who feels like she is not enough. Maybe she has a 3 year old who can't name a single letter and has no interest in learning them. Maybe she has noticed at the weekly play dates that her little 4 year old is not nearly as articulate as the other children. Maybe she has already seen two other "My 3 year old can read!!" posts and her 5 year old can't or perhaps no matter what the color her child always emphatically says "BROWN!".  Regardless of the reason, somewhere along the way she has decided it must be something she is doing wrong. Somehow she didn't teach enough, or maybe she isn't monitoring screen time closely enough. Perhaps she should have invested in some early learning materials and started the moment her baby could speak. Whatever the case, her child is different and it is her fault.

To you mommy I say, it's a lie. I have 4 kids, I have a daughter who was reading by 3 and another daughter who is currently 4 and has no interested in letters or words or the sounds that they make. Same mom, same learning environment, just different kids. That is the beauty of kids, they are different. They learn things differently and at different speeds. Not because you did 3 hours of preschool work a day with them from the age of 2 up, just because we are all divinely designed to be different, and that is ok. Actually, it's not just ok, it is wonderful! It is absolutely no indication of the quality of parent you are or your child's future potential. Did you know Thomas Edison  was pulled out of school as a young child because his teacher found him difficult? The precise word she used was "addled" (confused, or having lost the power of development). Yet I currently am typing on my electric powered computer with lights on in my house. Thanks Thomas.  These kids are just that, kids! They deserve time to play and learn at their own pace. I don't mean to say that parents shouldn't attempt to teach at all. As you can see from the video above we do lots of teaching and learning in our house but most of it comes through play. My perfect sweet little 4 year old who has no interest in sit down learning, usually quietly observes and I don't push it. I know when she is ready she will learn all the things she needs to know, in her own way, on her own time. In fact, there are many studies that suggest that pushing education so early is having negative long term effects. (GASP!) But that is another topic for another day.

My main point is this, yes, my two year old knows all the letters in and can recognize her name, but if your two (or three or four or five) year old can't. That's totally okay, he just might invent the worlds first flying car.