Day 3

Today I am grateful for a husband who listens and loves me. (and who cleans bathrooms and mops floors)

Day 2

Today I am thankful for doctors and modern medication.

Day 1

Today I am thankful for a home that is safe from storms and floods. (Prayers are with you East Coast)

I didn't know...

• I didn't know a cold could last weeks. But I am living proof that it can, and does.
• I didn't know that kindergartner's would have SO MUCH homework. I am pretty sure that I did not have any homework at that age.
• I also did not know that in kindergarten you learn about adjectives and verbs and proper form of a sentence. #atthisratemykidwillbeagenius
• I did not know before Kaden started school that there is a certain peace during that half hour early in the morning before everyone wakes up. It is a perfect time to study scriptures and set my head for the day. I am not a morning person. I blame it on the grave shifts I worked through college so that I could still take 20 credits. However with Kaden having early morning kindergarten I made it a goal to wake up a half hour before him to get breakfast going and help him have a good start to his day. It has been hard, and some days I still roll out of bed at 7 when he comes bounding into my room. But I try, and when I succeed I feel a little more in control of the day. 
• 7 years ago I did not know that marrying Chris would be the BEST decision I ever made. But it was, and is. He is my hero, my fixer upper, the even to my scattered and the sane to my crazy, he is my protector and my "home". 
• When we started grad school 4 years ago I didn't know I would approach it's completion date with such apprehension. We have pushed for this, we have sacrificed for this, we have spent long LONG nights, endless weeks and drawn out months working for this. (By "we" I mostly me he ;)) Yet now as we are putting in applications there is a hint of hesitation. Every time Chris informs me about another contact for another job in Beijing my stomach churns just a bit. I am grateful to be finishing. I am excited to move on to the next adventure. I am SO unbelievebly proud of Chris and what he has accomplished because a Ph.D. in chemical engineering is no small feat. I know that change is GOOD and makes you grow. But we feel at home here. We are settled and comfortable with good friends and neighbors. All family is within driving distance and our kids see a grandma almost weekly. Everything about everyday is familiar. Kaden is in a school that I love getting an awesome education. (adjectives and verbs people!) However, when all is said and done I remind myself that there is a master plan. We will be led and guided and end up exactly where we should be, and there is great comfort in that. Besides Chris is my "home" and if marrying him is my best decision to date then following him halfway around the world (literally) can't be a bad one either. #Ineedtolearnchinese
• I didn't know that my craving for puff Cheetos during Addison's pregnancy would become a life long addiction. It is sad. I may or may not have dug a bag out of the garbage just to make sure there weren't any stragglers left in the bottom of the bag. #Ineedhelp
• I did not know how NOT ready for winter I was until it snowed yesterday. NOT. READY. So so not ready.
• I did not know 6 years ago how exhausting motherhood would be, exhausting, rewarding, humbling, fun, hard, frustrating, soul stretching, and above all defining. Motherhood has made me into a person that I could not have become otherwise. It has been my greatest teacher in patience, love and sacrifice. My kids make me laugh daily, sometimes I stop and watch them during the day and my heart bursts with love. I watch their eyelashes flutter on their cheeks as they sleep and I feel so blessed to have them, but did I mention that I end most days exhausted?
• I didn't know that ice cream, or the lack there of, would be the ONE thing that sends my baby over the ledge. But check this out...

It's nice to learn new things isn't it?

xoxo-

me.

Because I can't

Because I can't get enough of these big blue eyes...

or that sideways grin..

or her desire to constantly explore...

Or those ridiculously long eyelashes and chubby cheeks.

I don't get much done some days and I am WAY behind in the blogging world. But seriously... she is irresistible.

Soccer Player

Our little man started soccer. We have some great neighbors who informed us of an opening on their team. (I totally missed the registration deadline.)

He was so excited to go and play. He didn't really know what he was doing but he did know that he was suppose to kick the ball into the other teams goal.

As he was running he would sing and yell things like "Oh no you don't blue team!" 

He has some very interesting moves out there on the field. I am pretty sure half of the time he had no idea where the ball was.

During the game he was sitting out by me. I had dropped something on the grass and asked him to pick it up for me. He said "Mom I am a soccer player not a picker upper!"

At one point he just started doing yoga moves. When I asked him what he was doing he said " I am just trying to get as much exercise as I can."

He was so excited when I told him he had a coach. He said " REALLY? I have never had one of those before!"

They didn't win. Not even close. I think the score was something like 6 to 0. Haha but he had a good time. :) We have since worked on his soccer skills and I am expecting significant progress at his next game.

This is Kadens friend Mason that got him on the team.

A Scare

Ah my pretty little Taycee Lynn.

This picture was taken about an hour before we drove down to Salt Lake to get Taycee's Lab Results back.  I had no idea what I was about to go through.

I should back up and start at the beginning. About a year ago I started noticing that Taycee's hair was falling out. With even the slightest bit of tension clumps of hair would come out. Any time I put an elastic in her hair when I remove that elastic it is covered in hair. Her head is covered in hair that is broken. She has dry brittle hair. It has always seemed a bit strange to me, but I had no explanation so we just treat her hair with extra TLC. My sister-in-law started working for a clinic in West Jordan that deals with thyroid problems. She started to tell me about the symptoms of  patients with thyroid problems and a few seemed to fit Taycee. She told us that the initial blood work and consultation was completely covered by our insurance so we decided to give it a shot. Can't hurt right? Wrong. 

When we went to the first appointment I could tell that the doctor seemed skeptical. He said it was extremely rare to see a thyroid problem in someone so young. But he did agree that many of her symptoms were not normal. So just to be safe he ordered the blood panel. 

Taycee was a champ when it came to the blood draw. She had to be fasting so she couldn't eat any breakfast and they missed her vain on the first arm so they had to poke her twice. She didn't flinch at all and no tears were shed. When it was all over she said "I was so brave mommy! It only hurt a little!" and she was so proud of the pressure wrap they put on her arms because they were like daddys when he donates plasma.

Fast forward a week and we are driving back to West Jordan to get the results. They had requested that Chris and I both be there so I picked him up from work on my way down. When the doctor walked in he started asking about Chris and my health. After a few questions he said "your daughter has what is called Hoshimotos Auto Immune disease" He said lots of other stuff after that but the main bullet points were this

• You need to remove gluten and dairy out of her diet they are like "rat poison" to her ( his exact words)
• She will have it her whole life 
• Her immune system is "destroying" her thyroid (again his words)
• She probably feels awful every day but just doesn't know any different
• You (as in me) probably have it too.
• You shouldn't go see a normal doctor because they will just put her on thyroid medication not fix the problem 
• This is the reason for all of the things you were concerned about

I was shocked and devestated. I felt like a terrible mother for not figuring it out sooner. I felt guilty that she was feeling awful every day. I asked several times if it could be something else. The doctor showed me the level on her blood results and said "She definitely has it. And she will always have it."

We left the office with an order for my blood to be drawn and lots of worries and questions.

That week was awful. I was having a hard time accepting the idea. I was overwhelmed at the huge life change that faced us. I was so grateful that it was something that WASN'T life threatening and that COULD be managed. The more I thought about all that the doctor had said the more I started to question things. That "HIGH" level that the doctor told me meant she had Hoshimotos no matter what ( his exact words were " It doesn't matter if that level is 15 or 150 she has it") was only 2 points above  the normal range. Everything else on her blood panel looked relatively normal. The doctor seemed almost happy or excited that she had this life changing disease. 

I called primary children's to set up an appointment with a pediatric endocrinologist. I wanted a second opinion before we made life altering decisions. When I made the appointment I was told I needed to meet with her pediatrician before hand to get a referral. So I called Wee Care that night and the appointment was made for the next day.

On Friday I printed off her lab results and we headed to her appointment. I wasn't sure what to expect because I had no idea how much her doctor would know about the illness. The first doctor we talked to said that he was a specialist on Hoshimotos and one of the leading doctors in his field. 

When we sat down with Dr. Silas I explained how things had happened and what we were there for. He took her labs, looked at them and laughed. Like literally let out a laugh ( okay maybe it was more of a scoff) we talked about lots of things too but here are the bullet points from that appointment

• The other doctor is crazy
• Don't go back to him ever
• She is fine, that one level  that is MARGINALLY high doesn't mean anything
• There are many other more telling signs of Hoshimotos none of which she has
• Even if this was Hoshimotos we wouldn't treat her til it started affecting her thyroid ( which is completely fine)
• There is no evidence that supports the idea that cutting out gluten and dairy help.
• Did I mention he said never to go back there again ( after which he said, well that is what I would do, you are free to do what you want. :))

It was like a night and day difference. He did agree that she is probably deficient in some vitamin or nutrient and that is probably why she has the hair problems and dark circles but he saw no reason for life altering changes. He offered the referral to the endocrinologist in case we still wanted a second opinion but we declined, everything he said made sense. He went over everything on her lab results and explained all the numbers. He showed me the other main things they look for in Hoshimotos disease, all of which were completely normal.

I left there extremely relieved, and also incredibly annoyed. I could not believe I has spent the week agonizing over something that didn't even exist but I was so grateful that Taycee was okay. Sassy, and spunky and normal.

I like to give people the benifit of the doubt so I would like to belive that the first doctor we talked to honestly thought she was sick. I would hope that he wasn't so desperate to create a revenue for himself that he would mess with a little 3 year old girls life. ( the treatment plan there is almost 6,000 dollars none of which is covered by insurance) In the end we are just so grateful that all is well. But we definitely will never be going back there again.

Now just to lighten the mood a bit, some of Taycee's latest funnies

We took Chris to the train station to pick up his car one night and Taycee said "How did that get here?" I said "I don't know what do you think?" she said "I think someone stole it! I think the Lamenites stole it, drove it here and then got on the train and ran away."

While we were talking at the dinner table she said "mom do you remember when I had go to the dentist because my tooth fell out and I needed a new one?" This has never happened so I said "no, when did that happen?" She said "you renember last morning ( which is what she says for any date which is in the past) I went to the dentist and he put on a new rubby tooth for me." as she said that she rubbed her front two teeth.I could tell she really thought this had happened so I asked her who drove her there to which she replied "I did, because I grew big and you and daddy were just little so you had to be in the carseats in the back, RENEMBER?"  haha. She must be a very vivd dreamer. I still think she believes that happened.