I turned thirty. It seems like there should be more of a fanfare for the passing of another decade in your life, like at 4:03 am there should have been fanfares and a loud speaker announcing my many accomplishments and triumphs in the last 10 years. (okay okay, that may be a bit much) But seriously, the last 10 years of my life were pretty monumental. I went from being a 20 year old girl with a high school degree living in Utah to a 30 year old woman with a college degree, husband, 4...FOUR kids, a house, 2 cars and a dog. Not to mention relocating across the country. Yet that decade came to a close quietly while I slept with no fanfare or loud speaker. I do think perhaps my knee might have popped extra loud when I got out of bed that morning.
It has occurred to me lately how much of life is dependent on what you make it. We were made to be creatures that act and not merely be acted upon, and so it seemed fitting to create a list of 30...things? They aren't really goals because many of them are things I am already doing. It is more a list of things that will make my days (and therefore months, and years and decades) what I want them to be. 30 things to commit to doing as I turn 30 years old.
1. Be You Bravely.
I came across this phrase awhile ago and it resonated inside of me. In a world where there is the perfect poster mom on every social media site I find myself trying to be them instead of being me. I want to throw the perfect party like this mom, I want to take my kids on exotic vacations like that mom, I want to have a perfectly themed breakfast to go with every day of the week like the pintrest mom. Somehow in my desire to become the best mom I stop being me. I don't do it all, but there are many thing I do and I do them well. Sometime is take courage to stand up and just be you.
2. Do something new.
Life with kids is pretty predictable, sure there is the crazy of the normal daily routine but generally we do the same things most weeks. This world is a place full of opportunity and adventure to be found.
3. Find my happy.
This last year hasn't been the happiest of life. Adjusting to being away from home has been hard. I miss friends and family in Utah fiercely. I strongly believe in making your own happiness. Happiness is a choice and life just goes by too fast to not be happy. As this classy lady said "The trick is to enjoy life. Don’t wish away your
days waiting for better ones ahead. The grand and the simple - they are equally
wonderful." -Marjorie Pay Hinckley
4. Document Life.
My blog is my journal. I try to keep up on it, but more times than not I get busy and it takes a back seat. My kids are growing so fast and I feel like the minutes are slipping by. I know I can't hold on to these years they are little forever so I hope to keep a good record of it all to look back on. This year we have 1pm church so I plan to use my extra morning time on Sundays to spend an hour updating and documenting our life on this little blog.
5. Keep Moving.
One thing I know for certain, life never slows down. In all my attempts to slow it down I have never been successful. I find the only choice I have it to move forward with it. -- on a different yet similar note, an active Jill is a happy Jill. I will find a way to make it to the gym at least 3 times a week.
6. Increase in Learning.
Proverbs 1:5 A wise man will hear, and will
increase learning; and a man of understanding shall attain unto wise counsels.
Oh how I wish I could spend my life in school. Seriously. Minus the tests and homework. I would love to spend my days in a classroom learning. I feel like there is so much in life to learn. The possibilities are endless. I intend to take classes again one day when there aren't little bodies that need me at home. But for now I plan to attend an institute class once a week and make more time for reading good books.
7. Step outside my box.
I like comfortable, I tend to stick with what I know and what I know works. I find, however, that growth comes from doing things I don't feel comfortable doing. (As long as they are good things.) Pablo Picasso said "I am always doing things I can't do- that's how I get to do them."
8. Cherish Motherhood.
I love these little people that are mine. Motherhood brings a love I truly didn't know possible. The minutes seem to slip by and sometimes I feel overwhelmed by how quickly it passes. (Other times I feel flattened by the weight of how slowly the day drags :)) I want to cherish this time because I know it won't be this way forever. There won't always be little hands that reach for mine and little voices that call "Mama, mama!" first thing in the morning. I want to welcome each new stage because I cherished the last.
9. Date my husband.
The past few years haven't been kind to our dating life. There is no one to blame but ourselves. This is a busy time of life, there is always something to be done or somewhere to be running. Though we have taken life hand in hand we generally also have 8 extra little hands with us, which is wonderful but also hectic. Through it all he is still my one and only. He creates calm in my chaos and picks me up when I don't think I can go any further. Being with him make me better.
10. Say "YES!".
I find in my attempt to get everything done in a day I say "yes, in just a minute" a lot. Unfortunately that minute turns into hours and my never ending to-do lists wins out over building a fort or taking a trip to the children's museum. I want to respond more with just a "yes" because although somethings have to get done, others can wait until the fort is built.
11. Love without abandon.
I don't think you can say I love you too much. I don't think you can love too many people. I think in life we generally love too little.
12. Pray with real intent.
D&C 19: 38 Pray always, and I will pour out my Spirit
upon you, and great shall be your blessing—yea, even more than if you should
obtain treasures of earth and corruptibleness to the extent thereof. I want to spend more time on my knees and figure a few things out with the Man upstairs.
13. Lose myself in service.
It truly is in the giving that we receive. Staying in form with being myself bravely I must decide who I am which brings me to this quote "The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the
service of others" - Ghandi.
14. Be Present.
I have found there is a great difference in being somewhere and in being PRESENT. I want to soak up the good moments and learn from the bad. I want to be present for this one life I have.
15. Live life, lose electronics.
There is a give and take here. There is so much good that comes from electronics and then there is the mindless scrolling through social media. I refuse to let the meaningful important conversations be overtaken by a small handheld device. No phones in bed, or at the dinner table. Screen time is already very limited in our house but I still think there can be more connecting to people and less connecting to the internet.
16. Be a lady.
"Being a female is a matter of birth. Being a woman is a matter of age. But being a lady... thats a matter of choice." -Poetic Jay. I have a house of girls and I hope that they grow up to be ladies with a lot of class.
"Being a female is a matter of birth. Being a woman is a matter of age. But being a lady... thats a matter of choice." -Poetic Jay. I have a house of girls and I hope that they grow up to be ladies with a lot of class.
“The world has enough women who are tough; we need women who
are tender. There are enough women who are coarse; we need women who are kind.
There are enough women who are rude; we need women who are refined” - Margaret
D. Nadauld
I still believe there is power in lipstick and heels.
I capture a lot of moments, most of them are planned and thought out. Joining instagram has helped this some and I plan to make chat books of all my "in the moment" photos. I just know that when I look back in 20 years I won't care as much about the photo shoots with backdrops and props as I do about the messy pig tails and ice cream mustaches.
18. Do your best forget the rest.
Each day is a new start. Someday's I am a rockstar mom, some days I want to crawl under a rock. This mom things is hard and wonderful and I am constantly learning how to do it better.
19. Do what works.
I hate messy houses. I function better as a mom and a person when my home is in order. I spend time each evening after the kids go to bed cleaning up and after I send the kids off in the morning I start my day by getting the house in order. I use to feel like that somehow made me less of a real mom, as if having a messy house was a sign of true mothering. Perhaps it is, but that just doesn't work for me. Spending an hour each morning cleaning before we start our day makes life at our house easier. It's what works. I will continue to find what works, and do it.
20. Find my people.
I need people in my life. I need the friends that come over weekly and laugh until we cry. I need that friend that just gets me. The hardest thing about coming to Virginia was leaving behind all my people in Utah. I found a friend here in Virginia (here's looking at you Jen) that made me remember how much I need my people. Unfortunately she is leaving me in a month (insert alligator tears), so I need to find more of my people.
21. Eat real food.
I have had an itch to do the Whole 30 cleanse for over a year. I bought the books and read all the information. The whole idea intimidates me and let's be honest, life without oreos doesn't sound like a very happy life. However, I believe there is a lot of truth in the saying "you are what you eat" and sometimes I think my family is turning into a giant cookie. Although I serve a fruit/vegetable with every meal we also eat a lot of goldfish and fruit snacks. I don't feel like we eat un healthy but I am also positive we could eat less processes sugar. Since I am the planner of meals and the only one who grocery shops I have some power when it comes to what goes in our bellies. At some point this year I will do the 30 day cleanse and hopefully make those bellies a little healthier.
22. Embrace life's curveballs and own them.
If there is one thing I have learned from the past 2 years it is that life can't be planned. I love lists, and I am a fierce planner. The joy I get from checking off items on my lists is a little insane. Sometimes I write things down I have already done just so that I can put a little check next to them. I like to have a plan for every day. I remember when I was little, maybe 7 or 8 I would write down my day's plan to the the minute. Color from 8:15-8:45, Read a book from 8:45-9:00... I would even schedule in bathroom breaks. I like to know what comes next. Somewhere in the last year I have come to the realization that I will never know what is coming next. There will always be a curveball thrown when I least expect it, and usually it turns out to be something wonderful. I am not always in control-- and that's okay.
23. Be grateful in ALL things.
I read King Benjamin's address to his people today in Mosiah. His words of our nothingness always strike me. Truly we are ever indebted to our Creator. I seem to always find it is not happy people who are grateful it is grateful people who are happy.
24. Don't shy away from the difficult.
Resistance creates strength. The strongest people I know are also the ones who have lived through the most difficult times. Doing things that seem too hard create opportunities for growth. Also, I find I am much more capable than I think I am, and there is just so much satisfaction in doing something I didn't think I could.
25. Make use of the minutes.
I suppose this goes hand in hand with being present but I think there are crucial minutes in a day that my kids are all mine. Namely breakfast, walking home from the bus stop, dinner, and right before bed when we are gathered for scriptures and prayers. These are minutes when there are no other competing influences for their time and attention. These are the minutes when I they tell me all about their dreams, their days, their worries and their ideas. These are crucial times of listening and learning. It is in these minutes that I truly see the wonderful people they are becoming.
26. Develop my talents.
I have always been a jack of many trades and master of none. I enjoy learning new skills. I find solace in playing beautiful music on the piano and capturing beautiful images with my camera brings me joy. Perhaps I will pick up a new skill, or perhaps I will just continue to work on the ones I already have.
27. Share what I know.
I have been blessed to always have had the truth of the gospel in my life. It brings a peace and a hope that so many are seeking for. I will find opportunities to share that gift more often.
28. Dream.
“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty
of their dreams.” –Eleanor Roosevelt. I married a dreamer and I am ever so glad I did. The next few years will prove to be excited and undoubtedly stressful, but watching him make his dreams a reality, well there is just nothing quite like it.
29. Stay Accountable.
That is why this list in on the blog and not just taped to the bathroom mirror. Being a mom doesn't exactly come with a boss to answer to and like I said earlier checking items off a list is my thing.
30. Find Balance.
I believe that the secret to happiness and success is balance. There is a balance between eating oreos and drinking kale smoothies, a balance between being content and searching for something new, a balance between giving of my time and finding "me" time. This balance may shift through different times of life but it is always there and maintaining it is important.
.jpg)
