The Meyers

I firmly believe that there are people Heavenly Father sends into your life. In fact, I believe that most of my answered prayers have come in the form of other people. I came to Virginia with such high hopes (and expectations) to find a group of friends that would become family and it just didn't happen. It was a hard adjustment for me and I was having hard time finding my happy. Then we met the Meyers. I know they were an answer to prayers at a time when I desperately needed a friend. They are in the military and had just been transferred (in September) to Virginia from Hawaii.  I was teaching Kaden's primary class when Bobby walked in. He sat down right by Kaden and introduced himself just like this "Hi! I am Bobby. My actual name is Robert Michael Myers the third. Have you ever known a third before? I am a third." He followed that up with "Do you like pokemon? I have 164 (I don't remember the exact number but it was a lot) pokemon cards!!" Kaden gave an equally enthusiastic reply and that was it, they were a match made in Heaven, instant best friends.

I was pretty happy to find out Bobby's mom was just as fantastic as he was, in fact their whole family was. They saved me. They took Virginia which was a pretty sad and lonely place for me and just made it better. Sometimes you meet those people who just get you, and you've been friends for a month but it feels like you've been friends for a lifetime. 

Several people at church asked if we were related, partly because their kids called me auntie (it's a Hawaii thing, and seriously the cutest) but also because the kids acted like they had been friends for forever.

Addi and Donovan are only a few months apart. They got to spend a lot of time playing together because between play-dates and family get togethers I think we saw the Meyers at least once a week sometimes more than that. Addison doesn't remember people's names except for family, she calls everyone Isa or Mom. So when Jen and Dono came over for a play date one day and she said "Hi DONO!" it was proof he basically like a family member.

After they moved she was walking around from bedroom to bedroom one morning saying "Dono...where are you?" 

Taycee adores Morgan and Morgan is a sweetheart and played big sister to Taycee most of the time.

For our ward talent no talent show we put a few numbers together. Chris and Mike won the talent for the night I think

Jen and I might have been a close second. ;)

When they found out their orders were to move to Texas the first of April I was so sad. I honestly cried more than once about it. We squeezed in every bit of fun time we could up until the night they left and then I stood in the driveway waving goodbye with alligator tears running down my cheeks. It's true though, these dear friend became like family, and they always will be.  We miss you Meyers family!!

Lonely but not alone

I am not sure how to write these things but I think it is important to be real when documenting life. So real and raw will be the theme of this post.

I am a person who surrounds herself with people. I have always been that way. I love a good party and our home is frequently the gathering place for game nights or get togethers. I thrive on friendships and good people, I have never really felt lonely...until Virginia. I think that has been the hardest part really, being alone. I was so blessed to have a street of good friends before we moved. Literally a whole street full of them lined up house to house. There was always someone to chat with, one of Taycee's best friends lived across the fence and lucky for me one of my best friends was her mom. There was always a helping hand and a friendly face. I don't think I knew then just how good I had it. I mean I knew I was lucky, but I don't think I ever realized just HOW lucky I was. Most of us have moved away now from that little street, but 2600 N it's surroundings and all of the people who were there will always hold a tender place in my heart. It was a really GOOD time of life. 

I still keep in touch with those sweet people, thankfully social media keeps me up to date with the big happenings in their lives, but I miss the simple conversations over the fence and the playdates on the sidewalk. 

I have never lived more than 3 hours away from my family and never more than 5 hours away from Chris's. We had a big family function at least twice a month and we never missed an event big or small. We were in the center of everything and it was good. 

Moving away has put us on the outside. We miss most events now, big and small, we are usually the last to find out about anything, and it's hard not to feel forgotten. Don't misunderstand, I know we are loved and missed. It is just the nature of things. Life goes on and events happen and we are not there to take part in them so naturally we become less involved in their lives.

My sister Jenny is getting married in 5 days! I wish I could have been there these past months to plan. I wish I could have helped with the details and little decisions. I wish I could have been on the inside of this awesome happy event. When my littlest sister called to tell me she had written the toast and I didn't need to participate anymore, I cried. Forgotten. It’s so silly, these little things that don’t really matter but that I yearn to be a part of.

My dad periodically sends a text with a little message that goes something like this. “It’s treat night for the Claytons, I put 20 dollars in your account. Love you- Dad” – I cry then too.  I don’t think he will ever know how much those little times mean to me. Not because of the money or treat but because it means he is thinking of us. We are not forgotten.

The truth is I am not alone. I know that. Chris is the best friend I could ask for and he is always ready with an ear to listen and a shoulder to cry on, there is no one in the world I would rather have by my side through all of this. I have little bodies that love me and need me and surround me constantly. I love them with all my heart and I am so grateful for this chance we have to become tighter knit as a family. Virginia will teach me something. I am not sure what it is yet but I am certain that every period of life has a lesson. Someday I will be on the other side of this time of life and I will be better for it, more empathetic to other lonely souls or more appreciative of the loved ones that surround me.

Life is lonely right now. But it won’t always be, and I suppose we must taste the bitter to appreciate the sweet.

Spring Break!

The kids had spring break the week following Easter it was such a fun week for all of us and I was reminded again at what great people these kids are.

Monday we went to another Easter egg hunt that some friend in the ward were having. The kids collected quite a haul of eggs to add to their already significant stash. Their baskets are still full of candy but they are slowly picking away at it with our "2 treat a day" rule.

Monday was the prettiest day of the week and we spend a few hours outside playing catch and drawing pictures on the driveway. We used up almost an entire box of chalk. 

Tuesday was raining and the kids helped me with my photography project for an online photography group I am part of. 

Wednesday was 'P' day at our house. We had pancakes stayed in our pajamas built a Pinocchio puzzle  played with play dough and ate popcorn. This was probably the kids favorite day. Taycee and Kaden both love puzzles and are actually quite good at putting them together. We went out and bought this puzzle especially for spring break. 

It took the entire week and we finished it on Friday. 

Thursday and Friday I had a lot of Spring Cleaning items I needed to get done. I think it was these days that the kids impressed me the most. They were the happiest little helpers. They organized closets and cleaned rooms, they even spent a couple hours out in the garden with me pulling weeds and getting the soil ready to plant. They were so great to do whatever needed to done and to do it happily. I was so proud of the responsible little people they are becoming, and I made sure they both got extra ice cream to show my appreciation! 

It was such a great week and I was so sad when Monday came and they were headed back to school again. One benefit to living here in Virginia is there is a lot more time that we spend together as a family and I love spending my days with these people!

Spring has sprung

Spring has finally sprung...mostly. We are starting to get more consistent days of warm weather and it has been glorious. I need sunshine in my life, I need birds chirping and blue skies and sunny afternoons at the park. We have all been enjoying more outside time. 

The kids especially enjoy the bubble machine witch I have found guzzles bubble solution in seconds but also produces a whirlwind of bubble that makes the kids squeal with delight. 

Welcome Spring! Oh how we have been longing to see you.

Easter

Holidays are always better when spent with family, and we were lucky to do just that for Easter. We drove up to Herndon and stayed with Mckell and Devin Friday night. Saturday the kids went on an Easter egg hunt in the backyard.

As soon as Brielle realized there was something inside of the eggs she could eat the hunt was over for her. She just sat down and started eating her eggs. 

The last egg to be found was the "golden" egg which contained 2 dollars. With some hints and extra searching they finally located it tucked away in a bag inside the grill. 

Cute kids with their Easter finds.

We also colored some bright and happy eggs. 

Mckell and I experimented with boiling methods. We boiled in 3 different pots one pot we added baking soda another pot had vinegar and the last was just plain water. Our consensus was that the baking soda water definitely produced the most peel-able eggs. 

Because I CAN run

 At the first of the year I started making all sorts of big plans. I don't think it had much to do with the New Year as much as my impending 30th birthday. I started making a list of 30 things that I wanted to commit my year to. I am not sure if it was the "Do something new" "Keep moving" or "Don't be afraid of difficult" I suppose it could have fallen under a number of categories, but something (some crazy, determined, insane little something) made me decide to run a 10k in March. 

Chris said he would run with me. He is always so good to support me when I take on a new challenge, although I don't think he really believed I would see this one through. You see, I HATE running. I have never ever been a runner. My lungs burn and I feel like I am slowly running out of oxygen. I have very under active sweat glands and so my body doesn't cool itself down and I get overheated easily which leads to awful headaches and nausea. Chris had good reason to believe my new goal wouldn't last. I believe our first day of training he said "Let's not tell anyone we are doing this so if we back out we don't look like quitters" -- see, no faith. 

There is something inside of me, perhaps it is pride, that hates being told I can't do something. Running had always felt like something I couldn't do, something that was out of my range of capabilities. I wanted to prove myself wrong and I did. Mostly.

I made up my mind and we went for our first run the next day, 1.8 miles. There was nothing easy about training. We used the app couch to 10k because we had no idea what the best way to train was. The first day we ran for 60 second increments. Run for 60 walk for 90 I came home after and laid on the floor thinking "dumbest idea EVER." Actually that thought crossed my mind more than once. My lungs were so weak when we started. At the end of 90 seconds of running my lungs would be on fire and I was certain someone had their hands clenched around my airways. Thankfully after about 2 weeks of training this slowly got better and at the end of the first month I could run for 5 minutes straight without any breathing difficulty. 

We started training the first part of January. Finding the time to make it to the gym together 3 times a week was one of the biggest hurdles. Time is a precious commodity and between work, church callings, and school obligations scheduling was tricky. The kids homework had to be done right after school and I had to make sure dinner was on the table the moment Chris walked in the door. We would eat and quickly clean up then pack the kids up and head to the gym, usually we made it home with just enough time to do family scripture study and prayer and then tuck the kids in to bed. We started running in January and by February my body was starting to protest. Knee pain was the first problem. I took a nasty fall down the stairs last summer and twisted my knee. I thought it had healed up fine but after a few weeks of running I wondered if perhaps the fall had caused more damage than I originally thought. I tried to work through the pain and used lots of ice and elevation after each run but it was clear it wasn't getting better and the pain was worse each time I ran. I bought a knee brace hoping it could help me run through the pain. It helped slightly but it was pretty obvious if something didn't change I would never reach my goal. 

We have a really nice neighbor that I chat with at the bus stop in the mornings who is a runner. He saw my knee brace on at the bus stop and we got into a discussion about running and knee problems. He suggested my shoes were the problem and recommended a local running store to check out. I went that night and after a quick gait analysis they were certain my knee problems were actually a shoe problem. Apparently my ankles over rotate inwards when I run which was pulling the muscles along the side of my knee. They recommended a pair of stabilization shoes, when I looked at the price ($130) I choked and then went to discuss with Chris. This was probably the closest I ever got to quitting. My knee was badly hurt, the shoes were way more money that I wanted to spend, there was no guarantee they would fix the problem, and to be honest I hated training. It was hard and exhausting and so inconvenient. Chris talked with me through the options and said he would support me either way. After some internal tug-of-war I bought the shoes and started training again. 

My birthday present, all $130 of it

Good news, the shoes helped my knee significantly, Bad news my toes were going numb every time I ran. Back to the running store we went. They analyzed the way I tied my shoes, my gait, my socks... and basically said "weird, your toes shouldn't be going numb." I have terrible circulation. My feet go numb every time I sit down for extended periods. If I am sitting straight legged on the floor my entire legs go numb in less than 10 minutes.  Maybe one day I will figure out what that is all about. I chalked the numb toes up to weird circulation and went back to the treadmills. Thankfully that problem just fixed itself after about a week of running in the new shoes. 

About halfway through February my left ankle started giving me problems. At first it was just sore, but it gradually started being debilitating. February 23rd we went to the gym as normal and after my warm up I started to run and almost hit my knees. The pain shooting up from my ankle was unbearable. I couldn't run at all that night and walked slowly for 30 minutes instead. As we left the gym that night I cried. I felt so defeated. It seemed each time I over came a hurdle there was another one waiting to greet me. I honestly wasn't sure if I would ever make it to the 10k goal. Chris took me straight from the gym to the store and I bought an ankle brace, I took the next 2 days off and applied a lot of ice and prayer. The next time I trained the pain was bearable, it never went completely away but it became much more manageable. 

Soon I noticed my right ankle was becoming more fatigued. After doing some research I took preemptive measures and bought a compression sleeve for support. I don't know if it was the sleeve or luck or just a tender mercy from Heavenly Father but my right ankle never got any worse. 

Training never got much better. I never enjoyed my runs and I always wondered how I would run 6 miles. Once I actually fell off the treadmill. I was feeling slightly lightheaded after a 2 minute sprint and I closed my eyes for a brief second and went flying backwards. Luckily only my pride was hurt. After 2 months I had built up to 4 miles. I think that running outside would have been better but the weather from January to March was record breaking low so we had to stay indoors. Training next to Chris didn't make things easier, he is far more athletic than I am and could run at a much faster pace for a longer time. I had to accept really early on that we would never run at the same pace and that was okay. Some days were better than others. The first time I ran 3 miles in under 30 minutes was monumental. After 10 weeks of running I finally ran my first 6 miles... then I went home and was completely useless for the rest of the day. 

The day before the big race I tweaked my back. It was like my body was putting up one final protest. I have scoliosis and have had back problems for most of my life. Running does not help those problems. I took it really easy that day and said so many prayers. I had come to far, and put too much in to not be able to finish now.  I went to bed that night praying I would be functional in the morning, thankfully I was. Race day was March 28th. The temperature that morning was 34 degrees with wind-chill it was 29. Cold, so very very cold. We packed the kids up bright and early and dropped them off with our good friends the Meyers. 

 When we made it to downtown Richmond we parked and walked about 10 blocks to the starting point. The wind was so cold, we had forgotten gloves and my fingers were ice. I shoved my hands inside Chris's jacked pockets and we walked in tandem. The 15 minutes we stood waiting for our wave to start was by far the worst part of it all. It was bitter cold, I was actually excited to start running so I could warm up. 

 Once the race started I actually felt pretty good. By mile 2 my fingers weren't freezing and I actually felt quite comfortable temperature wise. Cold temperatures are actually far easier for my body to run in than hot ones because of the no sweating thing. The first 2 miles flew by, I was in a rhythm. I wasn't loving it but it wasn't terrible either.  I had my fit bit tracker running on my phone and it would chime in my ear with my mile pace at each mile. I was running faster than I ever trained and I felt pretty good. In training I was never able to run for more than 20 minutes without taking 2 or 3 minutes to walk and let my body cool down a bit so imagine my surprise when I hit mile 4 and was still running along. I actually said out loud "I got this!" 

My finish time was 1:01.05. I finished 5 minutes after Chris who ran it in 56 minutes. We had planned to have Chris at the finish line to take my picture when I crossed but we also thought I would finish at least 10 minutes behind him. When I realized I was on his tail for most of the race I almost high-fived myself. 

So I did it. I ran a 10K!  I CAN run. I don't like it, my body struggles with it, I probably won't continue to do it. My ankle and lower back still haven't recovered and there are many other forms of exercise that I enjoy doing that don't beat me up so much, but that isn't the point. The point is I can do it. I can do hard things. I can push through and achieve what feels like an impossible goal, and the satisfaction in that is pretty awesome.